A Smidjin at a time

I'm not gonna lie. I've been pretty frustrated lately. I skipped a race I had been looking forward to. My mile time I swear is getting worse. I joined a weight loss challenge and GAINED weight. And I feel like my PT progress has been 2 steps forward 1 step back...with a couple random extra steps back. I have questioned why I haven't quite yet. But you know what? I almost gave up on another race this past weekend, but through the encouragement of a friend I showed up and walked 3x farther than any of my "training" walks this year. And you know what, it wasn't so bad. My legs didn't actually fall off, my back behaved the majority of the time, and the after party was a blast. I'm making more mental progress than physical progress. But I guess progress is progress. I audibly admitted (complete with sweat and a couple tears) how frustrated I am with my backs progress at physical therapy to the PTA I was working with this week, cause you know ...

DNS. Did Not Start Three letters that no "runner" ever wants to see next to their name. But alas, last week those letters and my name were used in the same sentence in regards to a race. Remember how this all started last year? Shamrock Run 8k, a wet and windy and pretty dang miserable first race of what would be an amazing year. Well, somehow I allowed myself to be talked into registering again. And really, I was excited to. I wanted to do a repeat race and be able to compare. But the closer and closer race day came, the less and less my body felt ready for it.  If it was simply a matter of just not getting enough runs in to feel like I would accomplish my goals. But more like a legit my back is still freaking out and I haven't really trained at all, and I was doing another run the day before that meant a lot more to me. So I found myself making the hard/easy decision to skip shamrock, even though I had my bib and shirt already. But here are a few things I learned fr...

It's finally almost here. Like seriously, in twelve hours I will be huddling with the masses, stretching, breathing, and praying for strength. The clothes are laid out, the bag packed, the carbs loaded, and the nails are being painted.  While the last several months have not physically gone the way I wanted, they have been very beneficial for me. Both of my PT guys being runners themselves was so helpful, they have helped me not just get my core healthy and strong again, but have talked training plans with me, interpreted weather reports and taught me secrets about my car.  So I take all the wisdom that has been shared with me, I will trust my training, I will breathe, and I will laugh and smile and enjoy my time out there. See you all over the finish line. 

Thirteen. It's kinda a big number today. It's thirteen days until I go out there and do Thirteen.One miles with my friend Randi. To say I am nervous is an understatement. My training hasn't gone exactly as planned. I have developed shin splints in the last month or so. My inner scaredy cat is making her presence known. I fought a migraine for a whole week. I backed off on a couple of the planned long runs. I have been Frustrated. I have cursed during a short walk. I have cut routes short because I was hurting. Or because I lost confidence in myself. I have cried on the living room floor. I have doubted myself. I have thought about giving up. But I haven't given up. I have trusted good friends with these frustrations. I have listened to their humor. I have absorbed every word of wisdom and encouragement they have spoken over me or texted me. I have planned the race outfit. I have even sewn my skirt. I have iced. I have stretched. I have foam rolled. I have become bes...

How did I end up here? What got me to this place where I am less than 2 months away, 6 weeks to be precise, from doing my 2nd half marathon? Especially considering I did not have fond memories of the first one and I swore I would never do another one again.  In order to best understand that, we have to go back to where this current journey all started. Mid-October 2015. I was right around my heaviest weight ever, heavier than 6 years ago when I had started my weight loss journey. I was mad at myself. I was mad body. I was even mad at God a little. And then my co-worker started mentioning that she needed more people to sign up on her Shamrock Race team. It was still 5 months away, I figure I had plenty of time to train and survive the 15k event. But the more I trained, the more I doubted, the more my legs objected to all the work, the more the idea of 15 kilometers (9.3 miles) seemed very scary and very, very undoable. So, the day of the race, I switched to the 8k. And it still...

It's been a trying couple of months since I last sat and wrote stuff down. But it's also been a couple months of incredible growth. Lets start where I left off. Day One of training for a half-marathon, also known as Day One of Back Pain. Steroids brought relief for a couple of weeks, but when it returned it was muscle relaxers and Physical Therapy time. And man, physical therapy has been the most amazing torture I have ever done. Twice a week I go in and get my butt kicked with what looks like should be simple workout moves (trust me they aren't) and then I usually get to just lay there for 15 minutes on some heavy duty heat while the e-stim is zapping my back. All the while I get to talk running and racing with my PTA Don. Thankfully the PT Nathan and Don are both runners, so when I first mentioned my race in December, they have been fully on board helping me get strong enough to achieve that goal. And while the first couple of weeks I felt like I was getting behind with...