A Smidjin at a time

I am not sure if that really makes sense, even to myself. I want to lose weight, I want t get in shape. I plan my meals, I plan my workouts. I even get excited abut them. But then staying focused when I am on the treadmill, or lifting weights is so hard. And not go to the grocery store on my way home to get something that suddenly sounds better than whatever healthy thing I had planned.

I am very happy to report that after my ugh weekend, Monday's reboot, tuesday and so far today wednesday have been amazing. Stayed on plan, uber activity points (yesterday at least) and total side benefit, saved a ton of money on healthy food at safeway. And once again the chineese smelled really good, and I got in line. But I only got 2 potstickers, and they weren't nearly as good as I remembered them being. Which hopefully means the chineese won't tempt me nearly as much. I'm sure it will tempt me but hopefully not as bad. So this week my work schedule is a little weird and I won't make it to weigh-in tonight, I have to wait till the saturday one. I haven't been to the saturday one months. I am actually kinda glad I have these extras days thanks to my funk weekend.

re·boot (rē bo̵̅o̅t′) intransitive verb, transitive verb Comput. to boot again, as to restore the computer to operation after a program failure We all have done it to a computer. And we all have wished we could do it sometime in the middle of the day. You know, go back to bed and try waking up all over again, even just walking out of the office for a minute and then walk back in all fresh. Trust me, this past weekend was a major "program failure" Friday night pizza, saturday lunch pizza, saturday dinner burger and fries, sunday lunch chicken nuggets and fries, sunday dinner mac and cheese. Oh and an entire bag of those stupid powdered mini donuts. And boy was I feeling that all sunday afternoon, not my normal peppy self. It was time to reboot. So this morning, instead of sleeping in super late I got up and decided today was the day I restored my programs. I ate a healthy breaskfast, did 20 minutes of a Bob Harper workout video (I only survived 20 minutes is more like it) did ...

Blah, thats how I ate, blah how I feel, and blah cause I basically couldn't come up with a catching title. I am so glad I earned 16 activity points yesterday. Becasue let me tell you, except for breakfast and and orange at lunch I did not eat healthy at all (unless you count Mental health). My back has been hurting that last couple days and needless to say I didn't really feel like standing in the kitchen cooking with last night or tonight. So pizza last night and a burger tonight. And just incase anyone is curious, no i did not hurt my back earning those 16 activity points. My back hurt yesterday morning, felt better in the afternoon so I went to Zumba and then hurts again today.

Before I get the to the important part I just need to get the following statement out: Popeyes Fried Biscuits are AMAZING. Always have been, always will be. They are the whole reason why 1999 when we had a layover in the Atlanta airport mom sought out the Popeyes in the concourse to get us food from there. Motivation Techniques: The other day while watching Biggest Loser (I got a lot of epiphanies from this last episode) we got to see the final 4 contestants (2 guaranteed in the semi-finals and America gets to vote out of the other 2) go home. As the embarked on the at home portion of the contest they were given a DVD that had a recorded message on it. It wasn't just the host wishing them good luck but it was someone to remind them how far they had come. See the first week they got to the ranch they recorded messages to their future selves. And they get them 6 months later. I really liked that idea. I decided that even though I can't record videos to myself I can write letters....

Well, tomorrow is another weigh-in. And unfortunately I think it will just be another weigh in, you know one of those 0.4 weeks. I am really good at 0.4. So I am watching Biggest Loser right now, and since it the the week before the final they are doing one of their signature challenges. The "put it back on" challenge. For those who don't know what it is here is what they do. The take the total weight each contestant has lost on the ranch and make them wear it again. It is usually broken down into something that can take off in the same increments they lost it in. This paticula one they are walking/jogging a golf course carrying golf bags with poles equal to the weight they lost each week and at each hole they get to get rid of the pole that corrosponds to the week that hole represents. I have always loved it this paticular challenge (a close second is the car pull). I think sometimes you need to take that breif temporary trip back to where you came from to gain ful persp...

the deliberate obstruction of or damage to any cause, movement, activity, effort, etc. Why do I do it? We all do it. We all workout really hard, only to "refuel" with donuts or the entire container of potato salad. We all do a long race, and then take 4 weeks off of working out. I have spent the last 5.5 months losing 3 pounds. No really 3 pounds. Mostly cause I am really good at losing 0.5 pounds then gaining 1, then losing 0.5 then gaining 1.5, then losing 0.5. I don't think deep down inside that I want to so this. But I keep doing it. Is it my will power, is it something deeper emotionally. And if so what can I do to "fix" the problem.

Snowball effect is a figurative term for a process that starts from an initial state of small significance and builds upon itself, becoming larger (graver, more serious), and perhaps potentially dangerous or disastrous (a vicious circle, a "spiral of decline"), though it might be beneficial instead (a virtuous circle). This is a very common cliché in cartoons and modern theatrics. The common analogy is with the rolling of a small ball of snow down a snow-covered hillside. As it rolls the ball will pick up more snow, gaining more mass and surface area, and picking up even more snow and momentum as it rolls along . Well I hope to not gain mass like the snowball but I am really hoping this last 0.4 pounds that I lost will be my snowball. See it took me up to 27 pounds lost so far. Out of the 26 point something I have been flucuateing around for weeks now. I am wanting that motivation to keep growing, and the numbers to keep growing. One good workout leads to another, which leads...

Has anyone else noticed that standard safety features are not standard on bandwagons? Cause I keep falling off, and I know that with a seatbelt I wouldn't. It's getting annoying, and I am getting bruised up and tired. I would really like to stay on board, but everytime I hit a pothole the springs over the wheels bounce and flying out I go. I am very proud of the fact that I chose a nice big salad for dinner tonight, it was a moment of at least grabbing the reigns of the horses pulling the wagon, hoping to jump back on here any moment. It's makeover week on Biggest Loser. And I needed it this week. I needed something to remotivate me. It was so amazing seeing the transformations, especially Olivia and Hannah (my purple team). They looked so pretty, and they felt pretty and beautiful, and that made them look even better. I want to feel that. most days I feel good, but I hardly ever honestly feel pretty or beautiful. And I want to, I want to look in the mirror and not have ...